The fog of others

It's easy to let others tell you who you can become. For years I was bullied out of my own skin by a coward who loathed himself. We trust the wrong people to love us, we trust the wrong people to build us up when we're vulnerable, because we're too fragile to build ourselves up. As I was laughed at , and ridiculed, put down, humiliated,by a guy who spent years afraid of his own shadow, I realised the most sacred lesson I should have learned. I kept reaching out for love for friendship, but self is love, and family is network. It is important to know who you are and where you come from,otherwise people who are weaker, who have failed themselves will use you as a crutch as a platform to build up an identity of strength. The guy who bullied me for years spent years dragging his face across the pavement, he could barely hold his own shoulders up. Now I think of the humiliation he caused me, the false friends he gathered whilst doing it, and I can only laugh, because I see so much clearer now. Once upon a time through his fog of insults I couldn't see at all.

Pots of gold through pain

We wait for pots of gold to collide with the practice of pain. I am in the midst of it, we say, there should be something for this chaos , this mess, that I can't seem to rectangle myself from. This upset. This is madness we shriek, it's not fair. Who told you, that life plays fair. Many of us come out of the womb thinking that life is a fair battlefield, that someone else's chaos is separate to yours. We watch the news, click the screen off, it's faraway, it's distant. Truth is, we are all connected. To even up the score , to play your own makestic round, I will say what I say time and again, use your mind. The mind is the most powerful asset in the world, utilise your time. You and a millionaire, a billionaire have one thing in common, this is a message that someone else taught me. You have 24 hours. 24 hours. How will you use your 24 hours, how will you use that time? What questions do you ask? What problems do you solve? If you slip into a mighty depression and simply believe you are the problem.....this is a problem. You have a purpose, train your mind to find it, and face the challenges that come with it.

Life and your liasons

life will throw some opportunities your way, what you do with those opportunities define the type of individual you become. Change comes. It is a torrent pushing some to the edge ,others will find a stream, a narrowed path and travel through it. The biggest affliction is a mind that cannot succumb to change, it will overwhelm you, you will see boobie traps laiden ahead, mine pits of fear, and you will chorus from a shadow of your own misunderstanding.

Utilise these opportunities that come your way, ask the mind many questions, it will guide you if that is what you want of it. Seeker, empath, guardian, keep a keen eye. You must have your wits about you, you are no passenger in this trial we call life. Listen twice, and observe before taking action.

Your millionaire mind

It doesn't matter what people say about you, it's what you know about yourself to be true that counts. Low self esteem is a slanging match with one's self. We claw ourselves down, because we have the ammunition of other people's razor blade words, words that bleed out every core . Chain you to a new shadow, and sink you to a grave of self contempt. As an entrepreneur, a creative, an individual, as a self, you must love this self, you must affirm positivity to this mind. It is not your passenger, it is your driver, for it to steer you, you must respect it, bless it with new knowledge, connect it to people who have engaged with wisdom whose paths are growing, and excite it with new challenges. The mind loves challenges, your mind wants to show you your potential, but it must ease you into it, with goals, vision, and hunger. In the quiet times speak fire to become flesh, ideas waltz when they are given legs with actions, they parade themselves before you, triumphant, look what I've become, see my path, share my journey. Knowledge doesn't just empower, it heals.

T

A self to discover

Who lost you, and made you find yourself. Stuff. We deal with other people's stuff everyday. The world assumes it is emotionally hygienic, that 'we' are cleansed and it's the other individual with the problems. Yet here is a reality cheque to cash in daily, a problem comes with a solution. Those of us who identify others as flawed and simply watch them crumble, are really the ones with a storm coming our way. Growing up and dealing with my disability, especially the epileptic fits there was a woman who lived near me, that used to warn the neighbours about me cruelly announcing that ' she has problems steer clear." I became isolated and alone, until I discovered she had some challenges of her own. Yet not to bare all. Every individual you face has been challenged by this school called life, we are in education, we are finding out about our highest selves and our greatest power. You come to know your strengths when you are probed with a weakness.

To the victor goes the spoils?

It makes sense to want to dwell, we live in a world where people don't always play fair. They cheat. They use certain tactics to gain access to the information you have, to empower themselves and yet so they win? Not really. victory is a mindset. You are a Victor when you learn the art of happiness, some people will never be happy in this lifetime. It is a choice they make consistently with the actions they take. Greed, cruelty, envy , and when the light grows dim, they crawl their way back to you hoping you'll welcome them into your bosom. We are a product of the choices we make, we are a fragmented self, distorted self, damaged self, at times a broken self, yet in this lifetime, be an honest self. Be true to the reflection you see, do not be supported by other people's fears and other people's failures. It makes sense to dwell, yet we live in a world where dwelling is not the key to the answers you seek.

Inside his head

I thought about the perfect things to say. Sharp, polite , precise sentences, that roll in our heads. I see you in my minds eye, perfect as you are, a vision to escape to. The man with the heavy voice and the soft brown eyes. Capture me in the moistness of all your selves,an identity sandwiched, secreted in layers of fear. I am lost in you, yet searching me. We wake up in separate places.

Save to invest: Redebonyhotspot bytes

Avoid impulse buying
Avoid greedy marketers
Buy one get one free, means you have to buy one in the first place, only purchase what you need
Have a budget account
Carry cash and leave the card at home tucked away in a safe place, carry a small extra purse in case of emergency
Have a list what do I want versus what do I need
Distract yourself from the thought that your saving
Reward yourself with a star chart or goal chart for each accomplishment you achieve with your account
Focus on creative ways to raise funds
Recycle old items you are not using
Budgeting is not about penny pinching. Know what is a necessity. Get vouchers if there are things you really are interested in purchasing. Some people make the mistake of going on a financial diet, where they starve themselves. Then go junkie on items they don't actually need. Pair up with a buddy who is as passionate as changing their finances as you are. Attend free seminars you will find them on eventbrite, meet up, and blog about your journey sharing your challenges and successes with your audiences, it makes it feel as though you are answerable to someone. When you make an error or a sleight,, document it and write what drove you to that point. Are you an emotional shopper? Did you not prepare lunch the day before? Is your budget too unrealistic?

Get acquainted with more Financial articles, read about people, who have accomplished what you have accomplished, model and programme your mind until it becomes habbit. The key to any success is discipline, The key to financial growth is learning but to grow towards positivity there will be challenged, friction from the self, the mind is programmed a certain way, when you interrupt its pattern you will start to crave certain things. Take heart, it takes thirty days to create a new habbit. Formulate the habbit of saving and it will become less of a threat to a seasoned mind.

From saver to investor: Redebonyhotspot bytes

Saving is the psychology of discipline there will be things that will tempt you along the way.
You have set yourself up with a challenge to go from saver to investor, welcome to redebony's financial playpen poverty is a state of mind. A lack of discipline, tapping into source, and no knowledge of money, will leave you in the same hamster wheel as you were before. You want to build a portfolio which brings you a return on investment. Your key objective is to venture into the property market, so you have assets that bring a return on investment. Have a budget. There are many temptations when it comes to spending money, know what your Achilles heel is, list it so you can tackle it. Create a five year plan. A working plan which includes having a role that brings you income, in your spare time financially train and educate yourself. Growth comes through learning. To master capital, you must understand how to invest it to make maximum profit..Be it in property, a business, or an asset that you have thoroughly researched the market in. Know your numbers, have a journal where you document your progress. Regularly visualise your success, and create measurable attainable goals. It doesn't matter what job you do with the digitisation of the modern world and the impact of globalization, many are applying for freelance roles, or remote roles that allow them to work from home. Check out the Redebonyhotspot blog for more bites on how to go from saver to investor, get your five year plan ready.

Sophisticated Sophelia Goes against the Grain

Gone Against the Grain

I’m such a huge advocate for being fearlessly yourself and embracing our individuality. Why you ask?... Well let me ask you this, why do we need to be like someone else? Why do we all have to be the same? If you’re unable to answer that question, that is exactly it, it’s because we’re not meant to be the Joe next door but the person we were born to be.

I believe life is like one big puzzle and each of us are the pieces that make up the picture. Each of us are created and shaped for a particular place in this puzzle. We are born and destined with a purpose. But how can we fulfil our purpose when we are trying to be like each other and “fit” in because we want to be able to feel like ‘we belong’. For half my life I felt the same way, I wanted to fit in and feel like I belonged to a particular group or arena to the point where I altered my character, personality and even the way I dressed just to be accepted amongst “friends”.

One day I became tired of pretending, tired of being someone I’m not and having to suppress the person I knew I was becoming.  That day was the lightening that struck the tree. I chose to no longer care what people thought of me and worry about their judgements, I just wanted to be… Me. Me-Sophelia. Me –the person that never stops dancing. Me – the energetic, bubbly person with the quirky style. Me – the person who is meant to be the best version of myself and not the best version of Jane, Lauren or Sue.

I came to realise how we are continually force fed the idea that we need to aspire to this so called unrealistic “ideal person”, through media, magazines, adverts and even expectations of others that demands us to feel like being us is not good enough or it’s not ok to be our self. Well, let me tell you something – It’s more than ok to be you. I’m sorry but, ‘why be someone else when you were born amazing?’ Through all this encouragement to self-condemn I realised how important it is to proudly accept who we are and understand that we should be our self, embrace our individuality and how important it is to become your best self so we can find and fulfil our purpose.

Through this long thought provoking and riveting journey the road lead me to where I am right now, starting my brand and blog- ‘Gone Against the Grain’, encouraging people to simply and solely be themselves and PROUD. It is one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life, to help people who want to be themselves and find their purpose.

Being an individual isn’t about being an out-cast or “different” or odd but about creating a league of your own and breaking boundaries. We were all uniquely made and the reason is in our life’s purpose. I believe life is like one big puzzle and each of us are the pieces that make up the picture. Where do you fit in?

I’ve’ gone against the grain, you can too.

Redebonyhotspots savers and property column

Money talks when no one is listening, but we rarely pay attention to such demands as save, invest, pool your money, market your brand, till your capital grows, and let your money work for you. It's easy to get caught up in all the special offers, budget buys, buy one get one frees, discount and sales, yet what their cleverly asking you to do is to lessen your chance of becoming an investor. Investors acquire capital. Money magnetized to them because they invest in assets and commodities, rather than funding liabilities. Liabilities will blind side you with great campaigns, the car your friends have, the house you paid for which bills are accruing more debt, yet rather than leading out some rooms to bring in an income, you've packed it with ornaments so your next door neighbours can keep aweing at what a designers touch you have. How much is it costing you to keep up with the Jones's. When was the last time your pocket pleaded with you to start saving up? Well, I'm starting this challenge with you, this is the international piggy bank of savers ideas for those of us who have a habbit of saying goodbye to spare change. Change that would have transformed itself to capital. Join me for ideas, tips, and tricks as we save our way to the top!

Guest post by Francis Etuko:Noise in Nigeria

By Francis Etuko

The Chairman of the House of Representatives Comittee on Aids, Loans and Debt Management, Hon Adeyinka  Ajayi has corrected the perception that the legislative arm of government is against borrowing.

Speaking during an interactive session to consider States borrowing requests under the 2016-2018 External Borrowing Plan at the National Assembly, Hon Ajayi said nothing could be further from the truth as borrowing is an essential tool in a nation's finance architecture.

His words "permit me at this point to correct the erroneous perception that the legislature is borrowing avers".
" Nothing could be further from the truth, parliament is indeed aware that borrowing is an essential, if not unavoidable tool in a nations public finance architecture and is required for rapid and sustainable development" he said.

He also stressed thus " A situation where a nation borrows for consumption or recurrent expenditure at the detriment of long term infrastructural or institution  building investments and where debt services figures begin to rise greatly, eating deep into the nations available resources in its budgetary allocation is unhealthy and therefore unacceptable"

Wednesday's interaction became necessary following the request  from the Acting President,  Professor Yemi Osinbajo SAN, on the 25th of May 2017 asking the House to separate States projects from items listed in the earlier submitted 2016-2018 external borrowing requests plan, with a view to giving the states requests accelerated consideration.

Hon Ajayi reminded those at the session that the request of the Acting President was in compliance with the provisions of the Debt Management Office (Establishment) Act, 2003 and the Fiscal Responsibility Act 2007 which both enjoins the President to lay before the National Assembly its external borrowing plan for approval pursuant to the powers conferred on the national assembly under items 7 and 50 of part 1 of the second schedule of the of the constitution 1999  as amended.

The committee began its scrutiny with the Ebonyi state which intends to obtain from the African Development Bank, ADB and the Islamic Bank a loan facility of 150 million dollars which will be taken in tranches of 80 and 70 million dollars from the two institutions and is to be spent on developing road infrastructure in Ebonyi state.

The Deputy Governor of Ebonyi state,  Mr Kelechi Igwe who represented his state said the state has put in place a very robust structure to ensure the repayment of the loan facility.

This he stressed was in the proper tolling of roads which the state would vigorously pursue to ensure that the facility it is seeking is repaid.

his words " We believe that the roads we are building in Ebonyi state will have a life span of 30 to 50 years".

Igwe told the committee that Ebonyi is an agrarian state and has made an example in agriculture with the production of rice which stands the state out in Nigeria.

He said " In Ebonyi state the  sum of 2 billion naira was injected by the state into rice production and within 9 months it realises 4 billion which has been reinvested into  the states economy".

Present at the session were other members of the committee, the chairman of the Senate committee on Sports, Senator Obinna Ogba, representatives of the Debt Management office, Abubakar Sani and Maimuna Ibrahim, The country Director of the French Development Agency Olivier Delefosse.