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Anihilating A.T.M Syndrome: Stop being used for your money

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It's a funny thing when you come across people who constantly complain about being used for their money, some not all, make the mistake of talking too much about how much money they have. If your fed up with being used for your money, stop using your money as an advert to lure people in. Give someone a chance to like you, for who you are. Let them get to know you, see your qualities and celebrate them. I was watching the millionaire matchmaker recently and there was a prince who complained about being used for his money but here's the thing most of his introduction was based upon glorifications of his wealth. Men especially need to understand this.

There is a fiction that a woman will not love a poor man, a beautiful woman anyway. My question to you is, are there children in third world countries? How did those children come about? Did their parents have to communicate and conversate? Did there have to be some sort of respect? Wealth doesn't always command lasting respect. Do wealthy men ever go through divorces? Do they ever have trust issues because a partner has been unfaithful? Do they ever get let down, disappointed, hurt? Yes. Money means opportunities, it means extra choices, that someone who comes from lack may not be able to afford or tap into. You do not want to advertise yourself as somebodies meal ticket, you want to advertise yourself as someone's potential companion.

In a workplace the boss never tells you exactly how much money they have. He/she never tells you how much money the company makes, but their aware they are in a financial power position. It's simple really. If you ask for a promotion the boss tells you what  that he/she does not have the financial resources to provide what you want, because actually the things you need may not actually be what you require. What the boss is downplay the status of the company, they may start talking about cutbacks, or talk about how they understand your situation as they also have bills to pay, and it's a nightmare, only to see they've bought a new Mercedes, or when their ready to give you a promotion. It's called downplaying. They don't boom box advertise what they have because their not setting themselves up to be put in uncomfortable situations being asked for things left and right.

For example I have a friend who is always 'broke' and even when you know they have money, or you've seen a sign of financial flamboyance here and there, she'll quickly change the discussion to the state of the economy and all the bills she's paying. Why? Because with certain types of people it's their habbit to ask for money, or drop hints as soon as they see a sign you have something coming in.

How to love yourself

image by Lovely expressions


I am beautiful, and I am allowed to be flawed. I am constantly improving, evolving, moving closer towards my better self. You are not perfect. If the world was full of uniform perfect people, it would be a dull world we live in. Celebrate your little quirks, wether its a crooked smile, some gap teeth, a lazy eye. Whatever you have going on, pick the positives, focus on them and continue to build upon them.

If your self conscious of your image, there must be at least one thing you like about yourself. Is there something people are always complimenting you on? Is there something other people celebrate about you? Celebrate those things for yourself. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, make sure every time you get up and you look at your reflection you say something positive about yourself. 'I am beautiful, I am intelligent, I am ambitious, I am wise.'

Take pride in your appearance and whichever project you start to work on, give it your all, give it your best shot. Wether it's baking cakes, doing photography, fashion, design, go for it.

Invest your time in supportive people who will direct and guide. Be a positive influence not a jealous influence. Invest in things that will make you happy.

Establishing your ideals

image by hexdeflective

Ideals are such beautiful things. We dream of the holidays we'll go on , the cars we'll drive, the houses we'll live in. Coulds instead of shoulds. For our ideals to be realised it takes hard work. Hard work not glory work. Hard work is the work you get on with privately. Work that doesn't need a voice box. When I was younger even sometimes at present, I think the more you talk about it, whistle and sing; the more it gets accomplished. Here's a painful reality, talking isn't doing. Nobody is going to hit that goal, and do the work for you. The universe is testing us, she wants to see wether were all show and no go. If you are, or you have been. It's time to make a change. Then again, everybody in life has been a hypocrite. We talk out of our own excitement. Talking consistently about something, doing nothing about it, will ensure that nothing gets done. Commitment is realising that whilst your gruelling away you wont get that pat on the back. Sometimes you may be struggling on a product, and find that your being called a looser, being put down, made to feel small, inadequate, inferior. Yet in your heart you know that you are pushing and striving away. One day, that work will come to fruition. That hard work you put in that nobody saw, nobody respected, nobody got, will work out, and you will be filled with pride because you accomplished something spectacular.

Moving on from heartbreak in the new year

image by my goddess

In this new year learn a valuable lesson. Some people are off limits. It's not because their too good for you, but because simply put your too good for them. You may have pursued someone you thought had a good character, only to have the shades drawn in and the light shine through. They may have hurt you in the past, and your friends and family have a tough time wondering why you would even consider attempting to build a friendship. No worry, it's human nature. We often cling to what we feel is familiar. If someone provided us with love, or simply kind affectations when we felt absolutely worthless, lonely, hurt or confused, we remember them for that alone. Sometimes even if they've raked a stake through your heart, it's those moments that you remember. In this new year learn a timeless lesson we often forget to teach ourselves, you will always have you. No matter who lets you down, disappoints you, shocks and shames your heart, you will always have you. Appreciate yourself. Don't get brain washed with this myth that spending time on your own is all about loneliness. In privacy we have healing, self growth, a vision for success. You are a beautiful butterfly neatly encombassed in the soft cotton of a cocoon. Write down those New Years Resolutions, make them and stick to them. This is your future, your life, your time, if wasted could belong to someone else. Claim it.

It's an opportunity to make new friends, find a new love, but most importantly, love yourself.

How to stop attracting ugly people

image by Michael O

How do you define ugly? When I was younger I identified ugly as a shallow thing. Looks that didn't match magazines. Facial features that were probably regularly insulted or impolitely interrupted. Now I'm a little bit older, I see ugly as character traits. Jealous or bitter women, guys who are cruel and too gutless to speak up despite behaviour being wrong, saboteurs, there's an endless list of ugly. Yet there is Beauty in the world,sometimes we don't look close enough.


Sometimes were so overwhelmed by how someone looks rather than who they are we dont take the time to see what is right in front of us. Do you find yourself constantly dating the wrong guy?Someone who is emotionally abusive, hurtful, a cheater, a user, unavailable. I bet some of you started dating him because on the surface...he was beautiful. Matte surface, neatly turned out, nice hair, nice eyes, nice mouth, great body, charming...then as the relationship developed you saw someone that was cruel, mean spirited, ugly. Only time revealed to you exactly who they were, and your lack of confidence made you an easier target.

Stop attracting these unappealing characters.

First remind yourself : You are beautiful, worthy of love, and have much to offer a special person; When i felt ugly not only did I attract some serious losers, but it was almost as though i had a flashing sign on my head saying. "Will settle for anything. Give me the scraps of affection you have." We all know the famous saying "People will treat you how you allow yourself to be treated."

Say it and mean it. If you are creating boundaries, stick to them and make them real. Dont continue to play emotional left field with yourself, this person who is making you feel small will attempt to make you feel smaller....and attract more loosers.

Smile....
Say positive affirmations about yourself evey morning. I am beautiful, i am kind, i am loving, i am attracting more love, i am a magnet for love, beauty and harmony. I am balanced.

Take pride in your appearance. Wether it's a gloss, a touch of makeup or something cool from your wardrobe, enjoy and engage. Celebrate your own unique infinity. You can be anything you put your mind to, focus on all the great things about yourself. You are evolving, the mistakes you've made, some may be in the past, others haunt you in the present, set your mind like steel. You will not let them overwhelm you.