Delicious depression

  

Do not distill,

my delicious depression
It pulses and rages
like an erection
jagged as blade
I may pivot and tilt
Sapping my orbit
A flower
I wilt
Do not distill
the deliciousness
of pain
sweat, blood
leaking
between your teeth
grinding
the heart
ant march feet
Nile eyes
Fingers that shock
Do i tell you
fables
Of all my bad luck
Sit it in corners
Give it pipe to smoke
Promise
some matches
For cinnamon toke
Do not rip
it from me
its curled
as umbilical rope
Im hoping and coping
and living
on token
of others happy oxygen
This crusted foot
can barely stand
dont feed me ambition
or half baked plans
In this life
im already sedated
it's dated
that your grating
and waiting
Do not distill
my delicious depression
I strike
at its keys
sing loud an
impression

Otatade Iseghohi Okojie,

Self pity and it's Swan song

image by lovemedont

Self pity is depressions best friend. We all get down from time to time, sadness can be a lullabye for some or a creepy shadow for others. Yet one thing is guaranteed, if you waste valuable time in your own self blame swamp, sinking yourself with anchors of pity, you begin to sink deeper into depression. Finding yourself drowning at every corner. There is always a mountain large enough for us to climb, of mistakes we've made, or things we did wrong. Write a list from 1 to 10 of the things you've done right. Things you've been successful at, which empowered you and made you feel stronger. Try and recapture how you felt in that moment. If you can just pick up a spark, maybe you can generate some of your old electricity. Have faith in yourself and your abilities, this will get you far in life. As far as you can travel as far as you can fly, dream big. The world wasn't built by ghosts it was built by real people, who have been through real things, real pain, real trauma, real mistakes, had to pick themselves up all over again. Be the best you that you can be, because the only person whose opinion really matters is the one in the mirror and that person needs a boost. Do , and say what ever you need to, to jump start yourself back into a positive train of thought. This is your life, and nobody elses.

Polvolting passed self pity

image by Crisco


Wow emotional relapse or what? We have moments where our self pity gets the better of us. Pity got the better of me yesterday, my eyes sweated out onions, and my smile needed a treasure hunt. Someone great once told me, failure is not something that happens instantaneously. It is a series of opportunistic regrets. People pleasing is such a destructive trait. We are failures when we give up on ourselves, allow others to tell us exactly who we are negatively or convince us were not good enough.

Other people will try and make you feel small because they feel small about their lives and themselves. Other people will make you question who you are and all the beliefs you hold dear to yourself. You may begin to compare and contrast. That is not your life. It is not your journey. You were not born to be like them you were born to be exactly who you are. To learn, to grow, and to evolve. Your journey is not about them. Ofcourse their opinions matter, without input, we lack the output to shape and evolve. Feedback is required. Yet there's positive feedback and there's negative feedback. Negative people will tell you everything your doing wrong and smugly sit on a throne of superiority, positive people will tell you everything your doing right, everything your doing wrong, yet always how they believe you can do it better. They care about you. They care about your improvements, growth, and successes. When we emotionally relapse it is important to associate ourselves with people who have real self esteem and are not motivated by their own selfish personal agenda's. The right people will be drawn to you like a magnet, the same way the wrong people will be drawn to you, like a magnet. Choose people who like to build and support those around them rather than tear them down.You fail when you quit. You fail, when you give up.