The truth about Money and Why you dont have it

Its easy to talk money, especially when your broke. Yet one thing i've discovered is wealthy people have a different style of management when it comes to their finances, a different belief system, and a different ethos. Human beings are complex, we all want to conform, and yet we want to be rich, we want to be wealthy. If wealthy people acted like 'normal' people, they would be broke. Everybody talks, everybody has their own style of wisdom from their years of experience, yet when you seek out advice from the wrong people and expect your life to take a certain path you will find yourself in trouble. Nobody goes to a homeless man to ask him how to build a mansion, nobody goes to a blacksmith to ask him how to paint a Monet, we seem to have a habit of letting others who seem to have it together, give us bad advice. Its like going to a hairdresser with a messed up hair do and expecting your hair to come out looking phenomenal, dude that's Russian roulette. So lets follow some of the masters of wealth and listen to their advice and their wisdom. Maybe the steps they advise can change our lives.

Rivers of change: Spirit is listening

Real wisdom, intelligence should leave an imprint. When you communicate you want to be remembered for not just how expansive your vocabulary is, but the density of the words impacting the soul of the listener. I was thinking today about greatness and the people we listen too, not the know it all's, but those who have a snippet of our experiences. Those who can connect. Talk is cheap because time is so expensive and yet, it is a priceless thing some conversations. We wish we could rewind back in time and have them all over again, they are like song in our eardrums. We like the company of the person talking and the advice they give. The right conversation can sell a book, a brand, an album, an individual, so speak to yourself. Speak to all the bruised areas of your soul that cannot be cleansed by mild conversation. Talk to self esteem, self love, motivation fighting spirit,challenge denial. Speak to growth, and just keep on talking, spirit is listening, so you must speak. Speak rivers of positive productive change.

Liaising with life

Life is a season of moments,wrapped in a neat cluster for selves to pick it apart. We are not islands, we are characters striving through dastardly seas of change, no helmet on, a whirlwind on our tail. Life is not easy, easy is for the lazy, and lazy people either get eaten by the wolves of their own demons, or remain fat stoic pumpkins that are fresh for mouths, and beyond that...... Here's a reality chewue for those of us to cash, time will change you, yet progress is not guaranteed. We are two sides of a musty coin. Yesterday I got asked a stupid question by someone I despise,today the voice tried to utter another poisonous question to slice at my confidence. Yet I realise I have an answer to all her many scrambling and put downs, it's quite simple. I just keep going. We who choose to explore our strengths are of great minds travel may not be smoothe but vision dedication and commitment will get you through.

Edible Enterprise

 It doesnt matter what they say, with a strategy, a target and some key objectives you can accomplish your vision. It is a journey of stepping stones, we leap eager to get to the finish line, yet self development and the growth of enterprise is a journey. I just had a meeting with my business advisor Leonore @ Sophia hubs the enterprise desk in Ilford. For the first time i shared it out loud. That cobwebbed whisper of a dream, that vision which kept me tossing and turning , scribbling with agitation in the middle of the night. Ashamed to announce it to the rest of the world. My goal is to make my first million blogging and giving back to the community, with effective business ideas, branding and strategy. It is the monster that lurks beneath my bed, the shadow in the closet, and the conversation i have with myself every morning. How many of us are on a journey? How many of us come from humble beginnings and want to make a dramatic change? Change is inevitable, progress is not. A dream is a delicious thing, it is both maddening and exciting, you wake up in the morning hungry to conquer the day, and you can, one bite at a time. Have a strategy, a routine. Tick off the tasks you complete, you will get there, elevation means lifting above the ton. You must elevate yourself with books, films, even music, engage with likeminded people and model a leader you respect. Remember, one bite at a time.

You are not beaten yet

Inspiration in a heartbeat

How to deal with fake people

secret lives of the super rich

we remember

Missing people
Missing place
Missing knowledge
Missing face
Missing smile
A kite to worlds
A day was claimed
Missing scents
And missing smells
Missing laughs
Blown straight to he'll
The platoon
We dock
We wait
We sist
We watch
How clocks
And time persist
Busy wardrobes
Lazy clothes
Weeping pain
And cardboard
Bones
Missing people
Missing pain
We wonder
If selves
Get reborn again

Feeling inner friendship: How to fight for the confidence within

image from absoluteart.com



It is an interesting thing, learning to allow the insults of others fall on deaf ears, yet today...it's something i plan to fight to keep hold of. People have a habit of trying to kick us when were down, and yet not all of them. There is  a world of people out t here. Not hundreds, not thousands, but millions, billions, and possibly even trillions. While we sit disecting the actions of the few, you are more than their narrow minded thinking. You are the way you are. Often times we fix and adjust ourselves according to size. Someone feels threatened so you humble yourself more, someone thinks your arrogant , so you ensure you express humility. Guess which lesson i had to learn the hard way this year. No matter what you do, there are people in life who will find ways and reason's not to like you. Yet for everyone who doesn't there are probably ten more, 50 more or a hundred more who will. Just as you are. Not needing you to negotiate your traits, not judging or questioning every move you make, because they have lives, and you are not the god of their existence.

I used to think that you need everyone to like you,then i started to realize with age, most people can actually count all their friends on one finger. People who have been there for you. There are people out there who will always be riled up because your something their not, you have a quality that they may not have.

Confidence is something worth fighting for. I was at a business seminar once and my Mentor asked me about close friends, feeling a loss, i said not too many of those. To that he succintly replied you have to be your best friend, you have to like you first before other people do, you have to see yourself as worthy enough to be loved, and worthy enough to be appreciated. We are a self worth discovering. I realize and i accept that people are flawed,some of the greatest people you'll ever meet, with telling stories, with vision with purpose went through this struggle called life. We are not perfect people. Do some of us go through hell trying to be perfect? Do some of us come through the Wars battling to please everyone around us, especially those we love? Yes. Can some of us be cruel at times, and be versions of ourselves we don't respect? Not that many people go out of their way to be imperfect, and yet i say to anyone who is trying to build themselves up, the person next to you is also carrying baggage on this trek. We may not be at Mecca yet, but we are still building and tearing down, your mental home will always need refurnishing.

Hindrance and haste: Moving past Waste (toxic people how to beat them)

image by Lovebun

" Oh my gosh he did what?!" Yes, actual verbatim, you don't need your best friend, sister, or even your Cousin screaming this guy is an arsehole run. You already have your tracksuit on and your trainers to make a Speedy exit. Often times we sit debating why, who, when, are we being over sensitive, is it really as bad as it seems. Just ask yourself one question, are you feeling like crap? Yes. Arseholes will often try desperately to defend their actions, claiming mightily how you drove them to such destructive behaviors, the toxic friend who winds you up then stands in awe as you detonate, convincing everyone else that your the problem. Here it is in a nutshell. In some way we are all the problem, we all have problems, yet how these people choose to relate to you, shows their challenges are clearly "mightier" than yours.

It is easy to allow people to overwhelm you with their stuff, you snap, you pop, you fizz, you sob and you weep, wondering what the agenda is behind it all. Why you are the target of their hate campaign, and how every single accomplishment you make somehow makes them the giant and you the midget in their eyes. This is what i'm starting to understand about life, misery loves company. It is the oldest rule in the book, yet to the woman who is sobbing in the dark as her charismatic husband charms everybody else then returns home to assault her after making such a performance of being Mr Nice Guy, or the Young girl who is consistently put down by her peers for being vaguely intelligent, these are not happy people. They are not happy in their lives, their not happy in their selves, their attempts to bring you down validate one simple thing, they have a lot of bitterness and too much time on their hands, the work colleague who seems to think every good thing you do is a setup to make them look bad. I know the question you ponder internally as you quirk your brow.
 "Jeeze what did i do?"

My Sister said something to me this morning that made perfect sense. We are nobodies punching bag, no matter the Story, no matter the excuse. People have no right to strategically make you feel bad when it's based on even a hint of envy. Go  for a walk, talk it out with your therapist, just don't take it out on me.

Then you have those village idiots who seem to enjoy using you as a foundation to entertain others, they lack self esteem in themselves, and you are the target for all their unfulfilled dreams. Everything they never accomplished in life, every failed relationship, every Company that didn't hire them, every person that's like you that rubbed them up the wrong way. Here it is. Big long sigh, hands in the air, it's not your problem. Your not here to fix them, you don't owe it to them. It is not our jobs to fix people, it is not our jobs to understand everything. We are not gods, we only think we are.

I'm the why person, always quizzing why, asking why, needing to understand why certain people create such a distance, such a divide, and celebrate the Gap they've built eager for an audience of empty ears. It's fine to create a distance when you believe someone is a threat to such things as family, the foundation of it all, some of us because of finance, we worry the world sees us as an ATM, and others are just smart enough to realize what it's hard to acknowledge most days. Happiness is wealth. Wealth attracts abundance if you mix with those who like to bury others in the gutter, you'll end up dirty as hell, nobody is Virginal when we take on the chaos of other peoples minds. Your mind has to be in the right place mentally, for you to accomplish success, and the greatest success is happiness. There's an old African saying, "show me your friends and i'll tell you who you are." Pick your company wisely. Money can be recycled but the time you waste with the wrong kinds of people, you can never get back.

Crooked places

image by Senju Hime

Crooked places
and we need love
with broken faces
Eyes that bulge
and sweat with salt
what i was
Then who im not
And all our little gypsy thoughts
The stray ones we once were
I wander bus stop
Catching tongues
Tripping wires
Of scents that burn
Time snaps it's fingers
Distant mess
A ringing phone
is in distress
The purse of lips
with smoke
Cloud in the air
For all chalk people
Wander here
Beneath the brook
Of trees that sit
A sky is dimmed
With grey scales lit
The cheese of day
Electric Night
And all our little Gypsy thoughts
Voices hiding in armpit soil

Cool conversations: The importance of effective intelligent communication

Image by Xeuszulumedia


It began with a smile. I was sitting outside a stall with a woman who designs clothes for Naomi Campbell, GMTV, and a host of other well known celebrities. An old man approached us, he was stammering on his feet, stumbling, his words seemed to flow into each other like wine from one glass being tipped into another. Despite looking extremely well dressed, long overcoat, neatly and well ironed, he looked very much like a drunk. He sounded like he'd downed all the ale in the local pub. Instead of judging him,i simply looked up and gave him the brightest smile.He introduced himself as "Lord .... of Hamil."
When i questioned the people around me, it seemed they knew him well, and were also convinced he was a lord. Anyway long story short it turned out he wasn't a lord after all.Simply an older man who has a thing for "beautiful brown skinned women."

The key to effective conversation is Listening. We often overcompensate for the insecurity of silence, by drowning conversation in gossip, no one really need indulge. How do you stake your claim on a conversation. Think of useful facts the other person might require in advance. Conversation will flow with ease from there. Are they in Marketing, advertising, promotion, business, the creative industries, whatever their Niche it is important to use your intuition, and tap into something that they might require. Make good eye contact, indulge them in polite questioning, so it shows you are still engaging their senses. Be excited to talk to them. The worst conversations are flat conversations where it feels as though it is a chore. Offer good advice, without sounding like a 'know it all' be humble.

Compliments are useful for effective conversation, as they divulge information,  notice something positive about them. Ask them about upcoming projects, ideas, or things they might be interested in, maybe things they may want to invite you to or Vice Versa.

Find common ground, if your opening ice breaker isn't effective. Some people break ice with a joke, others break it with honesty, " is this your first time here, i'm a bit nervous myself," then the person responds, that is when you pay attention to their qualities acknowledge strengths, rather than weaknesses. Pay attention to quirks, maybe cool restaurants they can visit, happening spots, or something interesting that might appeal to them. Most of all just enjoy it. Meeting new people can be intimidating, especially if your shy , yet people can actually be quite nice, they may be just as nervous as you are. Have a cool relaxed energy, and don't let the tension overwhelm you. Your not doing anything wrong, it's called recycling.

Weak moments are allowed

image by iraqiguy

We all have our weak moments, what's even more pathetic, are the people who use your weak moments to validate their lack of self esteem. Your destruction is how they get their kicks, and if they break you, they believe they will be happy. Sadly people like this show themselves for what they are, the reveal the pieces that are them, the broken images, the jigsaw of a shattered reflection, they cant bare to look at. The reality is they invite destruction into their own lives, they reveal themselves to those around. The wallpaper cracks are very visible. Here's a reality cheque sometimes we need to cash, if someone invests that much time in breaking your spirit, in putting you down, they must be pretty damaged inside. No matter how small they make you feel, remember you must be pretty important for them to invest so much time in tearing you down. Just remember, our weak moments, our silly moments, vulnerable, embarassing, even our humiliation is all worth it, because we can utilise it as a strength and become something greater. Let other people judge you, they too will be judged.

Eating self education

image by Ml1k

The conflict of miseducation leads us to believe we are less than we are. You are more powerful than you know, it is important to look within. Your spirit cannot be broken. Battered or beat. It is simple, refuse to say no to your dreams. Refuse to allow others to tear you down or break your spirit, because the world is full of people who try. If you find yourself attracting toxic people , keep your distance. Toxic people are contaminated, they spread poison, and it is important to build yourself up to Epic proportions. Have your vision in sight and keep moving forward , keep striving toward the change you need, and don't let anyone tear you down.  Or steal your joy. Sometimes people who are unhappy within themselves, are blood thirsty, and hungry to see you fall appart. It makes them feel better about themselves, it makes them feel like they have something in common with other people, Focus on building yourself up, when others are working so diligently to tear you down. I say it time and again, know who you are.

Chalk lane

image by Tallphill



Chalk lane
Belly cry
Teardrop storm
We try, 
For all old dreams that melt to dust
We look at warriors
one of us
Those who struggle to 
The surface
Gasp for were hungry 
For the sun
A tear drop storm
Belly cry
Chalk lane
All paper people are left behind 

Red ebony

Rain Dance

"we are only people,"
the warrior said to god,
My mouth was a weapon
my heart was a sword
And when i crumbled
and fell from grace;
I couldnt recognize
The eyes on my face
Those eyes like slits
with blinds that drew
and all the pain
My mind it knew
Like a car it breaks
I needed oil
A plant that's barren
Without soil
And all those scattered marbles
Whisper, whisper,
says the owl
says the educator
With a righteous scowl
Says a king
Upon his throne
and all the questions
that thrive and moan
How do i fix myself,
The warrior said to god
Said to angel
With the excalibur sword,
Said to the sergeant
and the Millitia men
Your present is now
Your past was back then

"There is no shame in the mistakes
we make
Sometimes in life
we need a break
To sew the threads
of battered hearts,
and rub the wounds
of clustered scars
The warrior crumbled
upon the ground
He sobbed aloud
and it echoed sound
For pain it carries
Stretched like a bow,
Choice is a mission
That wise men know
The warrior rose
From upon the ground,
standing tall,
his sandaled feet
His tired brow
" I am the horizon, i'll rise again"
In this life there's sun and rain.
Life is all about balance
Sunshine and smiles
and happy faces
and yet there's shadows in darkened
places
Open your eyes
and look beyond your pain
Take off your shoes
and dance for the rain

Red ebony

The importance of knowing who you are

Image by: Mothyuku

When people are convinced with trying to convince you that your ugly or flawed in some way, it's because that's how they feel deep down inside. Tearing you down makes them feel better about themselves but not for long because were only human and our rightful place is to ascend. In the workplace people become the target of Office bullies, the Playground, even in simple routines such as going to and from the local retail store, yet we have to realise, which i started to, those people will learn tha comparing themselves to you, and competing with you will bring their self esteem nowhere. In fact they will become doubly insecure, and others around them will be slightly turned off by this compulsive need to put the magnifing glass or measuring tape up to the two lives. Once upon a time i would find myself adjusting changing certain things about myself about my life to accomodate other peoples inferiority complexes, and as i would change and adjust it never fit quite right. I soon began to realise those people were never happy because they were miserable within themselves. Misery likes company, dont let other people define who you are. They are unhappy within themselves let them fix them and let you, build you. Love yourself and build yourself confidence. It is priceless.

Coping with Change: Understanding evolving relationships

image by BlackmoonLilly

Relationships change and sometimes it's the hardest thing to deal with. The ever changing push and pull tug of what did i do to change this dynamic, could i have been a better version of myself? Could i have been a more patient self? Could i have acted more as the person they gravitate to. Then we realise, we are who we are. In life the people who love you are supposed to accept you for who you are, wether it suits them or not. Sometimes you may love the bones off someone and the next day, not like them so much, the reality is we are only human. It is not a crime to be you. There was a point where i had so many people consistently telling me there was something wrong with the way i was, who i was as a person, and then i looked with disgust as these people would try and imitate me. Or people who tear you down to friends and relatives, wait till everybody's gone, try and get close to you, then when their frustrated they can't you become the bad guy. Your suddenly the villain, which means they don't have to be accountable for anything. Here it is in a nutshell, we are all allowed choice. I believe in the simplicity of it all, sometimes in life you never know what people envy about you. From your looks, to your confidence, to your personality, whatever it is. It is their problem. If your willing to learn as you grow, adapt, be vulnerable, because life is the biggest teacher. Life will humble us, and bring you to your very knees. We are all learning and we are all growing, celebrate who you are, because you only live once.

Merry xmas everyone from Red ebony! Make sure it's a happy one.

image by Nurnurich

Xmas doesn't guarantee that we will automatically be happy. Yet your happiness is vital for the day. We fight for our cars, jobs, people who are abandoning us, homes, fight for your happiness day to day, because in life there are distractions. I once made the assumption that simply because you decide to get your life on the right path, the whole world will instantly agree with you. Everybody else will fall into line, everybody will high five you and give you a pat on the back, and tell you how awesome you are. Just for the heads up this Xmas remind yourself how awesome you are no matter who is trying to tear you down, we deal with trial after trial, jealous attention seekers, assuming that if they shine a light on our flaws nobody will notice theirs. In life you are allowed to have flaws, it's called being Human. Celebrate your life.