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Saturday, 26 July 2014

Pre Before: Baby Pictures of the hottest Male celebrities


Do we know this fine gentle man?

Friday, 25 July 2014

How they make their fortunes.....and keep you on the wheel

I was going to talk about how to be a millionaire, but I think what needs to be said is what the people are dealing with in Britain. The system is structured to keep everyone at a certain level, especially the benefit system. People complain that the British Benefit system is being abused, and these are troubling times for us, more rules are instigated for the working class and the lower class to stay on the hamster Wheel in Jobs they hate. Yet when you strive to push beyond it the system counters you with an attack. Families who struggle financially, yet as soon as the Government hears your moving forward they either tax you more, or you aim to be more intellectually assertive you are penalized by the system for having the audacity to dare to dream of wanting more for yourself and your families. They have shows (Benefit Street), Jeremy Kyle shows, representing people on the benefit system as one label, lazy, greedy, opportunist. That’s three. Yet here it is in a nutshell. How about the governments that endorse the lives of Politicians, Rich people simply get richer because the system ensures they are in a hub that the Socially in elite cannot access. Politicians that are granted outrageous amounts of credit, celebrities on lifestyles they can’t afford, through the screen we watch them celebrate them, yet their living a life we should be in some ways allowed access to. Did you know that Google make’s billions simply from those Text ads and mini infographics most of us simply ignore, data is money. Did you know that if you are a celebrity and your website is linked to Google adsense, Cpc, PPC, and advertising Campaigns through the post, the companies representing them make  a fortune, Millions, just from you sitting in front of your Tv Screen watching their shows adictively, hooking you, and then you search online. Marketing companies pay them a fee to link to those keyword campaigns, and these tools are used to take the layman’s for Millions, so why do the layman simply get penalized for attempting to better themselves, or use Benefit money to facilitate a course, a masters degree anything that can live you above the ton. “ Yet there are laws,” really? Outrageous fines for those who try, why doesn’t the legal system tighten the crime laws? Why don’t they stop investing money in dead end programs to strategically drag everyone into jobs they hate, why not create more programs to endorse and facilitate those who have studied a career, taken years out of their lives in a field, and create a pathways program, instead of slovenly shoving everyone in retail jobs, or employment which has nothing to do with what they endorsed the government, for School fees, they end up consistently paying, for a life they didn’t even choose.

Thursday, 24 July 2014

Houdini Man

image by st3t0

If i could eat your voice
in my womb
Swallow the description of you
Bite into your youth
You are the second
that makes a clock tick
yet when i see you
Stomach rolls sick
As chalk outlines
the self it was
and bones have
just because
legs wrap like ribbons
around dreams
Yet you are
a houdini man
I stand on needle point
at ten
Eat strawberries
in my pigeon pen
Counting steps and trading
with selves that whisper
no longer nigh
For as i speak
my legs they quake
For words are tombs
or evaporate.

Voice in the shadow

image by magicnana

Does he exist? He has a voice like whisky in warm chocolate, i never see his face, his voice is warm and it cloaks you, like a cover or a sheet. I've fallen for strange things before, never voices you can't even look at. His voice is so strong, so masculine, it compels me to look in the opposite direction. I look at shoes, feet, nervously, hungry to hear a spoken word from him, but he never speaks to me. We have had conversations in the Jupiter that i live in, we smile amidst rich cream, talk much about our business plans and agenda's, he walks through the door, i am dressed in naughties, clad in interesting imaginations that men watch on screens. Only for him. As my ears peak like elves, sharp as daggers, i nervously sprint ahead, unhappy for eyes to click, fearful that sight may destroy. For i have seen much of my broken self, a me between light and shade. I tiptoe in between the criss crosses of my mind, terrified of a self only i can destroy. Then i hear a voice, like a broth, strong like oak, i think of a man whose eyes would terrify me, whose frame would intimidate a self that still plays hop scotch between mind as imagination, for there are many buses that come but my eyes yearn for that simple limousine. Or do we take the cab, or do i ride the bicycle, his voice taints the waters of my ink monet, i am a child again. Trapped in womb, yet grown in mind, and high heels walk ahead of me.

Friday, 18 July 2014

Pinching at the positive

image by Oshirit1

Its hard to think positively when your going through a rough stretch, in fact positivity can sometimes be the last thing on your mind. Yet when we tilt into a negative overture, it's best to find the positive things to focus on. Some may be many others may be few, yet if you don't have a little faith life will throw you and you will become toppled by our own feelings of inferiority, and the demons that lurk. Trust me i know i've been there.
Fight as hard as you can list the top ten things that will make you smile and another ten that will make you laugh.

Mine Smilers
Ice cream
Spending time with family
Making new friends
Coming up with a new idea
watching Sound of Music
Working on my blog, or reading

Mine laugh list
Funny films......endlessly
a joke made by my sister
My dog gogo and her funny humping habbit
Sadly when someone trips
You've been framed
sitcoms American dad and South Park
A funny quote
When a celebrity has done something ridiculous

The Omnibus

We reach
Stealthily climbing
from pain
a rung
Our battered sung
We eat the egg
of wise ones wombs
Forever needing
absent doom
The prick of tears
and subtle mess
I bite my tongue
were in distress
For harps lay sombre
and they weep
The bitter sting
the omnibus keep

Fallen Forgiveness: Why sometimes it's hard to let things slide

image by denizaybar

Yesterday, and today i thought about the irony of life. Of feeling lost alone and completely vulnerable. Almost two or three years ago i wrote a note out of the kindness of my heart to someone, it was done with the innocence you have when your still naieve and deluded about the sainthood of people. I thought he was a nice person. For years despite making me the object of ridicule, for almost two or three years out of a jealousy and a loathing that came from somewhere, standing by as i was targeted and harassed by family. Soon enough he began to spread malicious rumours about me throughout the neighbourhood, getting frustrated every time another man called me or went near me, whenever i was seen happy with someone, and before long he dragged other people into this warped obsession. From being called the ugly one, a slag, a slut, a whore, the African myth of fear, the family embarassment. Today i thought about how much was in my account, i had enough money to buy rope, i had enough money to hang myself. I wrote a note to my mother apologising for being so weak, i thought about where i'd do it, in a park with an oak tree where the branch was strong. It had become too much. I was tired of the abuse because i had written a note to a guy who was completely fucked up. As i stepped out unto the street, the family round the corner who were endorsed by his and his mothers obsession began screaming out of the windows as i stepped out unto the street, slut, whore, slag, when i told family i was often told it was in my head or the paranoid side effects of the epilepsy Medications i was on. When the insults were clearly loud enough to hear. This all began with one letter. It happened daily despite his mother who suffered from her own mental health problems, confessing to wanting some 'lesbian experience' with me, and was convinced that if she broke my spirit enough i would be susceptible to the charms she didn't actually have. Each day as i struggled with my own depression, determined yet eager to pick myself up, i was called the ugly dark skinned one, his mother would say " she's the one with problems" whilst his sister obsessed and jealous beyond contempt would request to follow me wherever i went.

Till the day i die i will hate these people they stand for nothing. Growing up i was told that if you were nice to people they would be nice to you back. His mother specialised in spells and Witchcraft, telling a series of lies, from the fact i was an ex prostitute looking for work, to a whole series of lies. This woman was so obsessed with me, it became truly bizarre, fairness rules equality. I realised i refused to be treated less than because my sister was the light skinned one and i was the dark skinned one. From being called the Epileptic monkey, hearing his family laugh about an epileptic seizure i had, and consistently hearing the statement "these are rumours  and accusations." I thought about the concept of fair, all this started because i was kind enough to write a note to a guy who i saw had no self esteem. As i regularly worked on projects, and eagerly tried to move forward, despite a sheer loathing for him as a man and everything he stood for, it became clear to me this guy had more troubles of his own. He would consistently shout the words " I made a mistake!!"  As though ruining someone's family life is a mistake like spilling milk on the floor, pouring sauce on someone's clothes, accidentally ripping an item of clothing. His mother would consistently announce to others that i made her feel inadequate. I believe she felt inadequate because of all the disgusting things she'd done to people. At one point him and his mother not knowing i could hear this strategically attempted to get me sectioned so they could have access to my brothers network and connections. On the surface they appeared normal beneath the surface they were a mess. They'd often say loud enough that an ex best friend had died, knowing i missed her at times. The family they had involved had eyes on our property. I was constantly pointed at by a neighbourhood bully whose obsession was to shout "That girl pisses people off because...." i'd never had a real conversation with this guy in my life. The only conversation i remember was one where he asked me if i liked harrods. During a group session i remember he had walked with me asking a series of personal questions, taken aback, i politely provided info, but kept myself at a distance. I didn't want to get close to any strangers at the time.

I wonder about the fairness of it all. This started simply because of a letter i had written out of the kindness of my heart. I think of an article i wrote a while ago about forgiveness, and i realise there are some people it is extraodinarily hard to forgive almost impossible.For those of you who suffer with the ache of pain, and find it almost impossible to forgive a slight, forgiveness will give you relief, give you healing, yet there are some sins which are hard to forgive. Then i realize, i refuse to buy that rope. Karma is the biggest punisher, their days will come.